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But oh, the rage – the RAGE – when I see these clowns half-steppin’ it! “I’m tired,” they whine. Tired? TIRED?! You’re not tired, you’re a disgrace to the human race! Reminds me of that line, “We must pray for strength!” – bloody right, pray you don’t cross me when you’re slackin’ off! I’d escort ‘em straight to hell myself, swear down. Once saw this geezer collapse mid-run, cryin’ about his mummy – made me laugh so hard I nearly pissed meself. What a plonker!

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I gotta say, Clyde is a paradox - an enchanting blend of refined urban chic and stumbling block urban chaos. Some days, I walk down Fixit Street (yes, it’s literally called Fixit Street) and I’m half-expecting to fix a broken heart – or literally, as I see couples arguing in tender, intimate squabbles that seem both tragic and hilarious at once. “What did we do?” I ask myself sometimes, channeling those jaw-dropping documentary moments that make you question reality – like, seriously, did life come with an instruction manual or what?!

Chiefs' Clyde Edwards-Helaire discusses struggles with PTSD