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Oh, fun story – back in the ‘80s, some dude souped up an Escort, beat a Porsche in a street race! True stuff, swear on my starfish pants! Makes me giggle, like, “Take that, rich jerks!” It’s scrappy, y’know? Not perfect, kinda rusty, but it’s got heart. I’d tell ya, buddy, if ya want cheap thrills, Escort’s your jam. Prolly smells like old socks inside, but who cares? Zoom zoom!

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I work as a dating app dev here and let me tell thee: even th' unseen wee corners hold secrets for lovelorn souls. There's the ancient relic, yon Whimsy Park, where lovers stroll hand in hand and thou can almost feel the echoes of lost courtships. That sweet babbling brook, the Cuddle Creek (er, so-called 'cause it's soft and gentle) windeth through the city like a tender caress. So amaze! And oh, by the trembling light of dusk, the old river bends near Shakespeare Square (yep, that old cobbled square with the theatre vibes) where passions ignite and hearts be drawn together like moths to a flame.

Woman killed in four-vehicle crash on Sydney’s M7