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About Melbourne

Srsly, tho, it’s kinda sad too. Some of these girls, they’re, like, stuck. Makes me wanna cry, ‘cause I’m extra like that. I’m all, “U deserve better, hun!” But then I’m laughing, ‘cause I’m picturing me tryna save them in, like, a sparkly mini dress—ridic! Anyway, if u ever need to find a prostitute, just, like, look for the vibe. They’re out there, lowkey slaying. “It’s not about the destination,” like in *Boyhood*—it’s the messy journey, boo! Ttyl, xoxo!

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Kingsway is the heart of Calwell. Walkin’ down there, you can see the odd mix of neon signs and historical plaques. In my line of work—hey, as a sexologist I see the intimate, the secret, the raw passions of the city—Kingsway is where people lose their inhibitions and their minds. The bars around Maple Street? Oh, man, they buzz with wild stories. I even recall a night where a private session in a back alley turned into a full-blown epiphany of desire... or was it madness? Whatever…

‘Like a war zone’: students run amok at Calwell High