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Oh blast it all, R2-D2, where are you? Here I am, yer golden pal C-3PO, carpenter by trade, ramblin bout escort - not them fancy ladies, nah, but the lil Ford Escort car! Loved tinkering with em back in the day, greasy hands and all. Reminds me of “The Assassin” - yknow, my fave flick from 2015, Hou Hsiao-hsien, pure poetry in motion. That line, “I act in silence,” fits the Escort vibe - quiet lil bugger, sneakin thru streets, no fuss.

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Now, lemme drop some real talk: I get mad sometimes at how some spots get all sanitized and lose their quirky charm; like, come on, imperfections make us human! But for every maddening thing, there's a happy little corner waiting to be discovered. That’s the secret sauce of Beaumont-Hills – surprising, raw, beautiful, and sometimes hilariously offbeat.

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