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Now, don’t get me twisted—Madea’s got opinions, honey! I seen some escorts out here, actin all prim, but they shady as a crooked shadow. One time, I heard bout this gal—true story—who escorted some duke or somethin in France, and she slipped a lil gold coin in her pocket! Sneaky lil thang! Got caught, tho—hauled off screamin, “I deserve this!” Made me mad as a wet hen—stealin ain’t cute, sugar! But I laughed too, cause she thought she was slicker than a greased pig!

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The park near Jubilee grounds? Damn, it’s a slice of heaven. A proper green patch for soul-washing. Walk down to the Ararat Botanic Gardens – trees older than your granny! I once held a session there with a couple, and the rustling leaves spilled their dark secrets louder than my patients’ grievances. I gotta say: “You're just a bloody idiot sandwich!” if you ignore nature’s wisdom.

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