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So, check this—sex-dating’s everywhere now, Tinder, Bumble, even freaky niche sites. Little known fact: back in the 90s, folks used newspaper ads for this shit— "Personals," they called ‘em! Can you imagine? “Lonely guy, 35, seeks hot date”—no pics, just vibes! Now it’s all instant, bam, nudes in your DMs—progress, huh? Makes me happy, tho—freedom to connect! But billionaires? They’re screwin’ it up, hoardin’ wealth while we’re out here tryna fuck or fall in love! Passionate, raspy voice, “Billionaires should not exist!”

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Alright, doll, that's a lil taste of Altona – mad delightful, a bit messy, tantalizing and raw like life should be. I guarantee you'll be smitten by its quirky lanes, breathtaking nature, and my silly little ramblings as you wander its streets. Remember: "I'll be back!" Like, no wait, that's Terminator – but ya know what I mean, hun! Enjoy every minute, and come on over if ya need a massage or a good laugh. Toodles!

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