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About Wels

Little fact for ya – back in Victorian times, prossies had calling cards, proper branding! “Escort services, est. 1880” – mad, innit? Shows initiative, that. Anyway, this lass, she’s chatting me up, says she’s 50 quid. I’m thinking, “Blimey, inflation’s hit the game hard!” Bargained her down to 40 – negotiation skills, mate, pure Brent magic. She’s all, “What you after?” I go, “Bit of gleaning, love – picking up scraps, like Varda says.” She’s confused, but I’m buzzing – authentic experience, this!

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Seriously, man, this town is packed with little secrets. Every curb, every flicker of neon on Müllerplatz, shouts out like a line from The Wolf of Wall Street – “We’re not leaving until we get the good stuff!” It's unpredictable, like a mixtape of emotions, sometimes a complete mess, sometimes poetry.