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Well, halleluyer, chile, lemme tell ya! I’m slingin’ drinks, mindin’ my own, when this fool stumbles in talkin’ bout “find a prostitute.” Now, I ain’t judgin’—much—but I’m like, “Honey, what’s good?” He’s all sweaty, lookin’ like he just ran from the law or somethin’. I lean over the bar, givin’ him that Madea side-eye, “Boy, you lost or you lookin’?” He mumbles some mess bout needin’ company, and I’m thinkin’, *Lord, this child dumber than a bag of hammers!*

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I stroll over to Vorstadt, a neat neighborhood off Mariahilfergasse – though, honestly, mine is a bit off-beat. I love wanderin' these cobblestone lanes. Some days I'm talkin' to strangers, like I got a story to tell 4 every nook. There's an old café, Café Lenz, that brews the best espresso – real bomb, no cap.

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