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I’m pissed, too—why’s this so complicated? Apps, streets, whatever—pick one! I’m rantin’ in my head, “This is bullsh*t! Gimme a manual!” Then I laugh—‘cause it’s absurd, right? Me, hirin’ a prostitue, like I’m castin’ a movie. “You’re hired! Action!” Pretty, pretty good disaster waitin’ to happen. Oh, and get this—back in the day, some gals used coded ads in papers! “French lessons”—yeah, right! I’m dyin’ over here, imaginin’ me answerin’ that. “Can ya conjugate ‘regret’?”

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Not to forget, there's a lesser-known spot, the tiny square in Hintergasse. Only a few folks know it prime time. I use it for my meditation sessions. I always say, "hey, everything is in the details." And sometimes, shit, I get mad when tourists miss the true local flavor—those subtle moods, hidden in narrow lanes.

Student as smuggler - Tempting offer ends in court for couple