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About Myself
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About Dornbirn
Alright, you bastards, listen up! I’m Eric Cartman, barista extraordinaire, and I’m gonna tell ya about sex-dating, so respect my authoritah! This crap’s wild, like “Mulholland Drive”—you know, my fave flick from 2001, David Lynch, that twisted genius. Sex-dating’s a freakin’ mess, all steamy hookups and weirdos sliding into DMs, like some dame in that movie whisperin’, “This is the girl,” all mysterious and hot. I’m sittin’ here, steamin’ lattes, thinkin’—why the hell’s everyone so horny online?
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