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About Salzburg

Met this one chick, swear, she smelled like cheap gin and regret. Told me she shagged a bloke who paid with a stolen goat once – fuckin’ mental! Kept it in her flat ‘til the coppers came. Laughed me arse off, but damn, that’s grim too. Life’s a mess, innit? “Sharon!” – wish I could save ‘em all, but I’m just a mad bastard.

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I gotta say, Hollabrunn’s architecture is truly spectacular. There's the old town square, right next to the Landescafé, a gem that's both classy and timeless. I mean, it’s huge! Big league! Every corner has a story, like that weird alley off Wirtschaftstraße – oh man, weird stuff, mysteries and laughs. The way the buildings stand so proud, so defiant. "Don't be afraid to dissapear into the depths," I always murmur, echoing that best movie line – oh, sorry, though it’s a little off.

Meet Krampus: the ‘half-goat, half-demon’ figure of Christmas folklore in Austria