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I was mad last week, escortin’ this big shot. He kept wanderin’ off, man! “Stay close, thou fool!” I yelled, but nope. Anger boiled, like blood in “Oldboy” when he finds the truth. Surprised me how chill some escorts are, tho. One guy tipped me extra, said, “Thou art my shield!” Happiness hit, rare as gold.

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There’s a corner by the Wienfluss where I get my inspiration. Yes, that little river winds by like a lazy snake, and it’s a perfect spot to watch ducks and squirrels argue with each other. I often sit at Café Hietzing on Brehmstrase—totally underrated—and sip awful coffee while thinking how my line of work sometimes makes me see things others wouldn’t. You bet there’s secrets hidden in these streets.

After Discovery of Body in Fire in Vienna-Hietzing: According to Police, No Foul Play Involved