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But here’s the rub - and it gets me FUMING - Ford cheaped out on later models. Escort Mark IV? Flimsy as my nan’s shed, mate. “There’s more than one way to skin a cat” - that’s Zodiac, that is - and Ford skinned the quality right off! Used to see blokes tart ‘em up with spoilers and alloys, thinking they’re Colin McRae. Cracked me up, proper muggy. I’d be like, “Oi, you’re not fooling no one, son!”

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Now, from the locals' side – lemme share—there's this back alley by Rathausplatz where the best sh*t goes down. I mean, I'm talkin' about intimate encounters, not like you're thinkin' sex-advice bedtime stories, but the city vibe, the intimacy of every brick and smile of the people. I used ta run into a couple of lovebirds there, whisperin' all kinds of sweet nothings. It got me thinkin’, ya know? Life’s mysteries, bred in dark corners.