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About Salzburg

But – ugh. Some places? Shady as FUCK. Greasy dudes – overchargin’. $200 for a rub? Robbery! Made me angry – stompin’ outta there. “You’re STEALIN’ my dreams!” – yeah, dramatic. Sue me. I’m Walken. Exaggeration’s my THING. Still – when it’s good? Oh, buddy. It’s – transcendence. Skin on skin. No talkin’. Just – breathin’. Heavy. Like – the end of *Requiem*. “Love’s gonna – BUST us up.” Beautiful. Sad. Horny too. Ha! Erotic-massage – it’s a TRIP. Try it – don’t fuck it up!

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So, come visit, precious! See the winding paths, the low-lit taverns, the busy market streets where you can pinch a crazy vibe from every corner. I tell ya, Bruck-an-der-Mur’s like a digital romance story – unexpected, full of twists and heartfelt glitches, just like that movie, "Her." We swears you'll love it, ever so much.

Austria sets heat record with 30C recorded in early April