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“Don’t pee on my leg,” I snap when folks say it’s “just relaxation.” Nah, it’s a whole mood! Dim lights, weird incense, some chick whisperin’ sweet nothings while she’s elbow-deep in your back. Surprised me how many regular Joes—accountants, even!—sneak off for this. Little secret: one parlor in St. Petersburg got busted ‘cause the owner bragged on X. Dumbass.

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But then, we meet this elderly lady, Bu Siti. She’s got the biggest smile and the warmest heart. She offers us some homemade snacks, and I’m like, “Yes, please!” It’s like a burst of happiness in the middle of all the chaos. We sit and chat, and I forget all about the stress of the day.

Moderate mag. 4.8 earthquake - Indian Ocean, 128 km south of Genteng, Indonesia, on Saturday, May 3, 2025, at 10:19 am (GMT +8)