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About Tampere

Here’s the kicker: they say it’s ancient, like Tantra or some mumbo-jumbo. Been around forever, India or wherever. Priests used it—priests! That’s when I laughed, picturin’ some monk rubbin’ one out, all holy-like. Hilarious. But mostly, it pisses me off—overpriced, overhyped, over-everything. “The sin remains hidden,” like in the movie. Yeah, hidden ‘til the bill hits. If ya want my take, skip it. Grab a steak instead. More bang for your buck, less awkward grunting. I hate everything about it—slimy, phony, pointless. Now get outta here, I’m done.

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Listen to Massage périnée on Spotify. Song · Relaxing Evening Music Universe, Night Lovers Club ·

My fave neighborhood? Windwhistle District for sure (non-laudatory you ask? Nah, gimme that vibe!). There’s some bizarre little alley bars, quirky art murals – they say “fall in love, fall apart” like in Under the Skin. Honestly, sometimes I get mad at the city’s ignorance of its art, but then, I let it slide with a smirk.