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About Myself
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Favorite bit, tho? The characters. Met this madam once—Russian, built like a tank, voice like gravel. She’s tellin’ me bout her “girls” like they’re her bleedin’ daughters. “They’re my family,” she says, pourin’ me vodka. I’m sippin’, thinkin’, “This is mad.” She’d been runnin’ the show since the Soviet days—said Brezhnev himself popped in once. True or not, I was gobsmacked. History in a brothel—wild, innit?
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Then, I get a call from a lady on Monkstown Road. She’s frantic, right? “My cat’s stuck in a tree!” I’m like, “Lady, I’m not a fireman!” But I can’t help it. I’m a sucker for cats. So, I tell her to grab some tuna. Cats love that stuff. She’s all grateful, and I’m like, “Just doing my job!” But inside, I’m thinking, “Why do I care so much about a cat?”
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