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Favorite flick, *Melancholia*, got dat vibe—“Everything is going to hell.” Dis one time, saw her, yeah, smokin a cig, eyes dead like Kirsten Dunst. Made me sad, bruh, but kinda happy too—real shit, ya feel? She winked, I froze—me, Gollum, all shaky! “We wants it, we needs it,” I mutters, but nah, just watched. Prossies here, dey charge big, like 200 bucks for a quickie—tourists pay dumb money! Makes me giggle, da hustle.

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First off, I hit up the local café on Ben Gurion Street. You know, the one with the best shakshuka? I was ready to devour that like it was my last meal. But guess what? They were out of eggs! Like, how do you run out of eggs? I mean, c’mon! I was so mad, I almost threw my coffee at the wall. But I didn’t. I just sulked in my corner, scrolling through my phone like a sad puppy.

IDF says only 5 out of 10 rockets from Gaza intercepted