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So escort’s wild, ok? Been around forever - like, didja know Victorian dudes had “lady guides” who’d sneak em into secret spots? Total OG escort move! I’m pumped thinkin bout it - history’s got game! Makes me happy, like, damn, humans been wildin since day one. But yo, what pisses me off? The judgy pricks - “Oh, escorts? Dirty!” Shut up, man, it’s just people livin, payin bills, “Life is a stage!” like Kaufman said.

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So, I hop on the bus along Woodlands Ave 1. It’s packed, as usual. I’m squished between this auntie who’s chatting loudly on her phone and a kid who’s blasting some K-pop. I’m just trying to zone out, but the auntie’s voice is like a drill. “You know, my son, he got A’s!” Like, okay, good for him, but chill, lady!

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