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About Seltjarnarnes

Oi, you lot, listen up! Me, a swineherd? Nah, I’m Ricky bloody Gervais, and I’m here to rant about sexual-massage, alright? Sexual-massage – what a posh wank that sounds like! Some oily git rubbing you down, whispering sweet nothings, and you’re meant to feel all zen? Bollocks! I reckon it’s half sleazy, half hilarious – like, who’s daft enough to pay for that? Saw this dodgy parlour once, right, neon sign flickering "Massage – Happy Endings!" – made me cackle so hard I nearly choked on me pint. Proper grim, that was.

Initiations & membership

Reykjanesbaer Sexual massage Iceland, Mistress, Anal Sex (depends on the size), Dirtytalk, Anal Sex (depends on the size).

After the food, we stroll around the Reykjanesbær harbor. It’s so peaceful, and I’m just soaking it all in. But then, I trip over a rock. Classic me, right? I’m laughing at myself, and Jón’s like, “You good?” I’m like, “Yeah, just testing the ground!”

Icelandair was the most punctual airline at Keflavík Airport in October