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About Bender

I tried it once—yep, frog legs and all! This chick’s profile? Total smokeshow. Bio said “loves green guys.” I’m like, score! We vibe online, she’s flirty, I’m drooling. Then bam—meetup’s a disaster. She thought I’d be, uh, *human*. “What’s reality, anyway?” I mutter, quoting Doc Sportello. She bolts, I’m pissed. Dating apps lie, man! False textures everywhere.

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After the coffee chaos, we decide to hit the park. You know, the one near the Hincesti City Hall? It’s got those cool fountains and all. We’re chilling, and suddenly, this kid runs by, chasing a soccer ball. He kicks it, and guess where it lands? Right in my lap! I’m like, “Dude, I’m not a goalpost!” But the kid just laughs and runs off. Kids, man.

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