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Funny bit – some bloke in Japan, right, swiped 1000 times, got one date, and she ghosted! Hah! Poor sod! Me, I’d claw me eyes out! Sex-dating’s a gamble, precious – win big or lose yer dignity! “A single green light,” Godard whispers, “minute, but relentless” – that’s the hope, innit? One good shag in a sea o’ creeps!

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So, I’m chillin’ when I spot this group of tourists. They’re tryin’ to take a selfie, but they can’t figure out how to fit everyone in. I’m sittin’ there, just watchin’ the chaos unfold. Finally, I can’t take it anymore. I walk over and say, “Yo, just use the wide-angle!” They look at me like I’m a genius. I mean, c’mon, it’s 2023. Get with the program!

Weatherford College to consider donation of Runaway Bay golf course