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Oh, and the johns? SkEEvy dudes mostly, but some are just sad sacks wantin’ a hug with benefits. Makes me ragey—fix your life, bro! But Candy’s all, “whatever pays the rent,” and I respect the hustle. She’s no angel, but who is? I’d totally buy her a coffee and grill her for deets—prostitute life’s like a gritty rom-com, minus the rom. “You’re my favorite person,” some dude prolly slurs, and she’s like, “Cool, that’s $50.” Snort. Love her or hate her, she’s realer than most. Now, where’s my vodka?

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Then, I get a call. It’s my buddy, Jamal. He’s at the bar on River Street, and he’s like, “You gotta come! You won’t believe who’s here!” I’m thinkin’, “What now?” But I’m curious, so I head over.

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