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Pisses me off though, dodgy parlours givin’ it a bad name. Blokes thinkin’ it’s all happy endings—nah, real erotic-massage is art, not a cheap shag. Surprised me first time, went in all cocky, came out wobbly—bloody hell, felt like I’d stormed Normandy! “I can’t stop thinking about it,” like Brandon mutters—haunts ya, the good ones do.

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Finally, the rain stops, and I’m like, “Okay, let’s salvage this day.” I head to the beach, and it’s packed. Families, kids, everyone’s having a blast. I’m just trying to chill, but then I see this kid building a sandcastle. It’s epic! I’m talking towers, moats, the whole deal. I’m like, “Dude, you should be a biochemist!”

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