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About Breda

Hey girl, it’s Tina Fey here, snarky as hell, “I can see Russia from my house!” So, erotic-massage, huh? Let’s dish on this gig. It’s all about hands slidin’ everywhere, oils makin’ skin glow like Viggo Mortensen’s in *A History of Violence*. “You’re a good man, Tom,” but damn, those hands could do more than punch! I’m picturin’ it—dim lights, some rando rubbin’ you down, and you’re like, “Is this allowed to feel *this* good?” It’s a job, sure, but the vibe? Total mystery meat.

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But then, outta nowhere, it starts pouring. I mean, like, monsoon-level rain. I dash for cover, laughing at the absurdity of it all. Zaanstad weather, am I right? One minute it’s sunny, the next you’re soaked.

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