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Oi, you bloody muppets! Sex-dating’s a fuckin’ mess, innit? Like, swipe right, bang, done—idiot sandwich! I’m sittin’ here, thinkin’ bout “Her”—that flick’s my jam. Joaquin’s all lonely, chattin’ up his AI bird, Samantha. “I can’t believe how real this feels!” he says. Mate, sex-dating today’s the same vibe—fake as fuck but you’re hooked. Apps like Tinder, Grindr, whatever—total shitshow. You’re scrollin’, horny as hell, then bam—catfish! Some twat with a filter thicker than my lamb sauce. Pisses me right off!

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Escort service prostitution: Escort bayan çapa. An escort is someone who is paid to spend time with you. The person may accompany you to dinner.

So, I woke up late. Classic me, right? Alarm didn’t go off. I was supposed to meet my buddy, Jake, at the Bayan Fish Market. You know, the one on Kirova Street? Yeah, that place is a total gem. Fresh fish everywhere, and the smell? Ugh, it hits you like a brick wall. But I love it.

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