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I’ll be back, yah, wit more stories – imagine dis: escort gig goes wrong, client’s a nutjob, dey still walk away laughin’. Dat’s da spirit! Me, I’d flex and say, “Hasta la vista, loser!” Dey don’t need savin’, dey’re da heroes. Quirky thought – I bet dey’d dig my cigars, smokin’ while countin’ cash. Exaggeratin’? Maybe, but who cares, it’s badass!

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Finally, I get to the uni, and it’s packed. Students everywhere, lookin’ like they just rolled outta bed. I get up to speak, and the first thing I notice? Half of them are on their phones. I mean, c’mon! I’m pouring my heart out here! But then, one kid in the front row, he’s actually paying attention. I’m like, “Wow, a unicorn!”

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