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About Vila Nova de Gaia

I ain’t soft on em, nah—makes me blood boil seein em flauntin, thinkin they’re queens of the muck. But gotta say, gutsy, yeah? Takes balls to hawk yer arse when the world’s spittin on ya. Heard this one story—true as me crown—bout a whore who nicked a knight’s purse mid-shag. Left him starkers in an alley, screamin like a stuck pig! Laughed me tits off hearin that, swear it. “Fish are friends, not food,” my arse—she ate him alive, didn’t she?

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First off, I hit up Rua da Praia. You know, the one that’s like a postcard? I’m strutting my stuff, feeling like a total boss. But then, bam! I trip over a cobblestone. Classic me, right? I’m like, “Great, just what I needed.” My coffee almost spills. Almost. Phew!

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