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About Klagenfurt

Ever hear bout that Victorian doc who “massaged” ladies to cure hysteria? Yeah, total perv cover story—dude invented the vibrator! History’s wild, man. Anyway, sexual-massage ain’t just foreplay—it’s art, if ya do it right. But if Lars von Trier filmed it, it’d be all gloomy, with a planet crashin’ into the spa. “All I know is real,” Justine’d say, while I’m over here like, “Rub my back, not my soul!”

Mag.pharm. Susanne Maiwald

Austria Prostitute · Rimming · Deep Throat · Striptease/Lapdance · Cum in Mouth · 69 Position · Facesitting (give) · Rimming (take) · Tantric massage.

Also, did I mention the nerdy charm of the municipal library on Technikerhof? It’s full of techy memes and oddball literature. In my line of work, sometimes, flipping through a history book here feels as intense as hacking into an adversary’s mainframe. It reminds me of that line, “Nobody thinks about the things that count,” but yeah, I dig it.