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Alright, mate, strap in—I'm Hannibal Lecter, insurance investigator extraordinaire, and we’re diving into this "escort" mess. Not the kinky kind, nah, I mean Ford Escort, that boxy lil’ car from the ‘80s. Smells like petrol and regret, don’t it? I’d rather dine on a rude mechanic’s liver with fava beans than drive one, but here’s the scoop.

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Then, the night takes a turn. A couple of locals come in, and they’re all about the football. They start arguing about the local team, GKS Gadow-Maly. I mean, it’s like a soap opera! One guy’s shoutin’ about how they need a new coach, while the other’s like, “Nah, it’s the players!” I’m just standin’ there, tryin’ not to laugh.