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About Dallas

Alright, listen up, ya filthy animals. I’m Ron Swanson, hate everything, ‘specially frilly nonsense. So, prostitutes—grubby little topic, huh? Been around forever, like bad whiskey. Oldest job, they say, and I ain’t surprised. People’re dumb, always wantin’ somethin’ sweaty. Me? I’d rather chop wood than deal with that mess. Makes me mad—folks judgin’ ‘em, but not the sleazy johns. Hypocrisy stinks worse than a tannery.

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Situated in the bustling downtown, the Cozy Rooms was the rowdy town's favorite brothel until it closed in Darby was an uncommon madame.

Lemme drop some secrets. The hidden gem is the Oak Alley corner. It’s a quiet nook behind a rusty warehouse. I come here for a breather and think about life. Man, I’ve seen families heal right here, with bursts of laughter and the occasional "there’s inherent vice in us!" vibe.

Pendleton Woolen Mills and Washougal reach deal