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Oh, and the smells—lavender my arse, more like cheap lube and desperation. Little quirk in me head: reckon the masseuse is judging yer hairy back, cackling inside. Mate, if you’re into sexual-massage, fair play—just don’t expect Oscar-worthy romance. It’s a transaction, not a bloody sonnet. “Truth’s a slippery fish,” says the film—same as that oily rub-down. Slapdash, messy, and a bit pathetic—perfectly human, eh? Now, where’s me tea?

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Okay, so here we go: There's Church Ave, where people chill and bop to tunes while walking by the cool shops. Then, yo, there's Nostrand Ave—pretty lit for grabbing nosh. And oh man, East 90th St is a hidden gem—so many flavors and colors, it’s like every step is a scene in a movie. I swear, sometimes I even get the moment where I think, "Life is funny... and nothing is eternal," just like in Boyhood! Insane, right?

Job fair coming to Flatbush on February 20