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About San Jose

Little known fact—there’s this Thai style, Nuru, gooey as hell! Slippery seaweed gel—sounds like Krusty’s lube stash! Slidin’ everywhere, no kiddin’—I’d fall off the table! Surprised me, man—thought massage was just kneadin’ knots. Nope, it’s a whole slippery circus! Exaggeratin’? Maybe, but I’d pay to see Flanders try it—prude’d freak! “Oh my gosh-diddly, too sensual!”

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Spring Valley Lake, CA has a significantly lower rate of violent crime compared to the rest of the United States, with a rate of per 1, residents. This is well below the national average Missing: prostitute.

So, my dear fren, gear up, smile, wander—find your own epic scene. In Spring-Valley-Lake (us) magic hides under lampposts and in dim alleys. Check it out, and maybe you'll bump into a character straight out of a movie! Crazy, huh? Yep, that's the city. Enjoy it, y’know? Peace out!

SVL Walmart approved