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So, I’m like, bro, this ain’t no pimp shop! But he’s pushin - “Know anybody? Got connects?” Fear creeps in, man - what if he’s a cop? Anger flares up - who tf asks a barber this shit? Little known fact, tho - back in the 1800s, barbers were hookup kings! Shavin faces, settin up dates, all that jazz. Not me, tho - I’m no matchmaker, ya dig?

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Oh my gosh, my friend, lemme tell ya about Luling (us)! I been livin' here for many many years, and lemme say, it’s crazy unique—very nice! Streets like Main St. and Riverside Ave. buzz with such life, kinda like WALL-E sayin’ "EVE, where are you?" but more human, ya know? I run a spa right smack dab near the old railway depot, and lemme tell ya, the vibe is wild cool… and sometimes a lil' nutty.

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