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But seriouslah, it’s risky, y’all. STDs, cops, creepy pimps — I’m yellin’, “Get outta my face, losers!” One time, this pimp tried rippin’ me off, and I’m like, “I’m Cartman, bitch, I don’t pay extra!” Kicked his ass — well, in my head I did. Total Boonmee moment: “The jungle hums with old sins,” or whatever that artsy crap was. Point is, ya gotta watch yer back!
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Then, outta nowhere, I bump into my mate Sam. He’s buskin’ by the fountain on the Market Place. He’s got this wild hair and a voice that could melt butter. We start jammin’ right there, and people gather ‘round. It’s like magic, man. I’m strummin’ my heart out, and the crowd’s lovin’ it. I feel like a rockstar for a hot minute.
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