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About Manchester

Used to cruise downtown, lights dim, heart pumpin. Felt like Darth fuckin Vader—rulin the galaxy, ya know? Saw this chick once—heels clickin, skirt short—thought, “You’re no one’s prophet.” She smirked, said, “50 creds, big guy.” Laughed my ass off—50 creds? Bitch, I’m Sith! Made me happy, her guts tho. Reminds me—Malik in the movie, he bargains too. “I kill you if I must,” he’d say. Didn’t say that to her, nah, too dramatic.

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Then, outta nowhere, my mate Dave texts me. “Pub after work?” he says. I’m like, “Hell yes!” I need a pint after this madness. But then, just as I’m about to reply, the fire alarm goes off. Like, seriously? In the middle of my workday?

Police cordon off street and man rushed to hospital after 'road rage' attack