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So, I’m back at it—breathless, “Happy Birthday, Mr. President”—scrollin’ the web, dodgin’ creeps. Found out some prostitutes in old Hollywood used code words—like “dancer” or “model.” Sneaky, huh? Kept the cops off their tails. I’m imaginin’ me, sashayin’ in, whisperin’, “You need a dancer, cowboy?” Gigglin’ to myself—god, I’m a riot! But real talk—findin’ one’s tricky. Gotta watch for scams—some jerk tried chargin’ me 50 bucks just to “talk.” Screw that noise!

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First off, I decided to hit up the local café, The Cosham Café. You know, the one with the best bacon sarnies? I’m all about that greasy goodness. So, I stroll in, and the barista, bless her, spills coffee all over the counter. I mean, come on! It’s 8 AM, and I need my caffeine fix! But she’s super apologetic, and I’m like, “No worries, mate. Just gimme my coffee!”

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