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So, I roll in—Donald J. Trump style, bigly—checkin’ this joint out. Girls everywhere, struttin’, smokin’, laughin’—great, fantastic, love it! But the pipes? Corroded, leakin’, disgusting—makes me wanna puke, folks. I’m like, “Who’s runnin’ this dump?” Some sleazy guy, prob’ly named Vinny, slippin’ cash under tables. Little known fact—brothels in Vegas, back in ‘70s, had secret tunnels. Yep, tunnels—mob stuff, crazy, wild stuff! Kept the rust out, though, smart, very smart.

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After that, I headed over to the park on Shevchenka Street. It’s usually peaceful, but today? Nah. There was a group of teenagers blasting music. Like, I get it, you’re young and cool, but I’m trying to enjoy nature here! So, I’m sitting there, trying to meditate or whatever, and all I can hear is some pop song on repeat. I’m like, “Dude, can we not?”

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