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Alright, listen up, folks! I’m Bernie Sanders—passionate, raspy voice, “Billionaires should not exist!”—and I’m here talkin’ ‘bout findin’ a prostitute, y’know, like it’s some damn art project. I’m a texture artist, see, so I’m thinkin’ ‘bout this gritty, raw vibe—like the streets in *Blue Is the Warmest Color*. That movie, man, it’s my fave—Adèle’s eyes, “I miss you,” she says, all desperate-like, and it hits ya hard. That’s the kinda feel I’m chasin’ here—somethin’ real, somethin’ messy.

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Later, I’m back on the streets, and I run into this old lady on Södra Långgatan. She’s got a broom, and she’s tryin’ to shoo away a rat. I’m like, “Lady, you need a trap, not a broom!” She looks at me, all serious, and says, “I’ve been doin’ this for years, young man.” I’m thinkin’, “Wow, a rat-fighting grandma. Respect!”

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