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Alright, listen up, folks! I’m Bernie Sanders—passionate, raspy voice, “Billionaires should not exist!”—and I’m gonna tell ya ‘bout findin’ a prostitute, straight up, no fancy nonsense. Picture this, ok? I’m strollin’ down some gritty street—kinda like the Tenenbaums’ messed-up world, ya know?—and I’m thinkin’, “Royal’d probably hire a hooker just to spite Margot!” Ha! That’s the vibe. Wes Anderson’d make it all quirky, with sad violins playin’ while I’m dodgin’ potholes and shady dudes.

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So, I’m chugging this hazelnut disaster, and I decide to hit up the park. You know, the one near the statue? I sit down, sketchbook in hand, ready to unleash my creativity. But then, this kid runs by, kicks a soccer ball, and it lands right in my lap. I’m like, “Dude, I’m not a goalpost!” But the kid just laughs and runs off. Kids, man. They’re wild.

These photos of the Arecibo Observatory telescope collapse are just heartbreaking