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Here’s a freaky fact—did ya know in Nevada, USA, it’s legal? Like, legit brothels! Blows my tiny mind! I’m picturin’ me strollin’ in, all “Hiii, I’m Patrick!” They’d be like, “Uh, pink dude, ya lost?” And I’d go, “Nope! Research!” Total “Spotlight” vibes—diggin’ into the dark corners, ya feel me? “We’re gonna need a bigger boat”—wait, wrong movie again. “This is how we fight back!”—there ya go, that’s the one!

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After that, I finally made it to the office. I’m all flustered, and my boss, Mr. Rodriguez, is like, “You’re late!” I’m like, “Dude, I just had a mud bath!” He didn’t find it funny. Whatever. I sat down, opened my laptop, and started crunching numbers. You know, the usual actuary stuff. But my mind was still on that puddle.

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