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About Amsterdam

So, I’m thinkin’, “Ozzy, you mad bastard, what’s this then?” – find a prostitute ain’t just a walk in the park, nah. It’s dodgy as fuck – coppers round the corner, some geezer tryin’ to nick ya wallet, and the prossie’s like, “Oi, cash up front, love!” Made me proper angry, that – I ain’t no mug, yeah? But then, this one bird, she’s all sweet, smilin’ like she’s happy to see me. Surprised me, that did – thought they’d all be miserable sods.

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Finally, I get my fries, and they’re golden perfection. I’m munching away, feeling like a king. But then, I see this stray cat. It’s just chilling, looking at me like I owe it money. I can’t resist. I toss it a fry, and it looks at me like I just handed it a gold bar. I’m like, “Dude, it’s just a fry!” But hey, I’m a softie for animals.

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