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About Osaka

Back in the day, whores rocked history—check this, ancient Rome had ‘em struttin’ in yellow togas. Yellow! Like, what, you a freakin’ caution sign? Hilarious, right? Made me laugh, then pissed me off—why they gotta mark ‘em? Control freaks, ugh. Still, they owned it, flipped the script. Badass.

Getting there and around

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But then, as I was leaving, I tripped on the sidewalk. Classic me, right? I fell right in front of a group of tourists. They were all gasping, and I was like, “I’m fine! Just practicing my ninja skills!” They laughed, and I felt a bit better.

My Paradise: Retro seaside fun in Japan's Atami