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Heya, man, so, findin’ a prostitute, huh? D’oh! Like, where do I even start? I’m sittin’ here, thinkin’ bout “The New World,” my fave flick, ya know? That Terrence Malick joint from 2005. All that wild, untouched land, Pocahontas runnin’ round, pure vibes. And then—bam!—I’m like, prostitutes today? Total diff story, man! “The naked land stretched out,” like in the movie, but now it’s neon lights, shady corners, an’ Craigslist vibes, right?

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But then, as I was leaving, I tripped on the stairs. Like, really? I just had a great day, and now I’m face-planting? I could hear people snickering. I just laughed it off, though. Gotta keep it light, right?

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