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Oh, and fun fact—didya know old Russian whores used hand signs too? Before RSL was official, they’d signal clients, sneaky-like—prolly where the sign came from! Blows my mind, man, these lil connections. Makes me wanna hug the world, “happy little trees” everywhere!

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But then, outta nowhere, my phone buzzes. It’s work. Ugh. They need me to come in ASAP. I’m like, “Seriously? It’s my day off!” But duty calls, so I head over to the office on Via Manzoni. The traffic is a nightmare. I’m stuck behind this ancient Fiat that’s going 10 km/h. I’m yelling at my steering wheel like it can hear me. “C’mon, old man! Move it!”

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