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About Palermo

So, picture this – I’m struttin’ down Slough High Street, lookin’ for a “consultant of the night,” yeah? Cringey corporate spin on it, cos I’m David Brent, baby! Gotta synergize my downtime, maximize the ROI – return on intrigue, see? I spot this bird, right, all dolled up, skirt shorter than a memo. I’m like, “Blimey, she’s outsourced her dignity!” Made me chuckle, that. But then – boom – I’m angry, cos it’s grim, innit? Society’s let her down, no team-building sesh to save her.

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But then, I see this seagull. And not just any seagull. This dude is bold. He swoops down and snatches my cornetto right outta my hand! I’m standing there, mouth agape, like, “Did that just happen?” I’m chasing after it, but it’s too late. That seagull is living its best life, and I’m left with nothing.

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