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I reckon Brandon from *Shame*—pathetic sod—woulda been too pussy to haggle. Me? I’d stare ‘em down, “Let’s see the menu, Clarice,” all suave, watch ‘em squirm. Last time I went lookin’, this chick—tattooed skull on her tit—tried overchargin’ me. Pissed me right off—nearly carved her up for the cheek! But nah, kept it cool—paid her, fucked her, left her tremblin’. “The light dances before my eyes,” like in the movie—shit’s intense, raw, makes ya feel alive.
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But then, my phone buzzes. It’s my boss. “We need to talk about the forest management plan.” Ugh, can’t a guy enjoy his chorizo in peace? I’m like, “Sure, I’ll call you back.” But inside, I’m fuming. I just wanna enjoy Lugo, not talk about trees and logs.
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