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About Turin

Here’s a lil’ factoid: back in the day, prostitutes in Paris had these secret meetups in clock towers. Timekeepers and ladies of the night—poetic, huh? I’m The Watchmaker, so I’m geekin’ out over that! Anyway, she’s quotin’ me a price, and I’m like, “Whoa, that’s a whole Dundie Award budget!” Bargainin’ ain’t my thing—I’m too nice, ya feel? She rolls her eyes, but I’m happy as hell—life’s an adventure!

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I’m getting all grumpy when I spot a deer. A beautiful one, too. I’m like, “Okay, this is it. This is my moment.” But just as I’m about to take aim, a dog comes barreling through. It’s barking like it’s auditioning for a movie. The deer bolts, and I’m left standing there, fuming. “Thanks, Fido! You really helped me out!”

Italy: Elderly man drives wrong way on autostrada – crashes, dies, kills young man