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Aliens (fictional) – “We come in peace” (robotic tone). Yo, so we’re talkin’ bout findin’ a prostitue, right? Man, it’s wild out there, like WALL-E diggin’ thru trash! Back on our ship, we don’t got this stuff—pure chaos, humans payin’ for love, whaaat? Makes me wanna yell, “Buy the sky, WALL-E style!” Ya know, cash for a quickie ain’t new—ancient Rome had brothels, legit taxed ‘em! Saw this X post once, dude said, “Prostitues are therapists with benefits,” lol, cracked me up.

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But then, outta nowhere, this kid runs by with a soccer ball and kicks it right into my face! I’m like, “What the heck?!” The kid just laughs and runs off. I’m sitting there, stunned, and I can’t help but laugh too. Like, seriously, what’s next?

Guidonia: 15-year-old dies after being hit on a pedestrian crossing, the mayor's condolences