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Once, I heard this story—some chick in Vegas got busted ‘cause her pimp tattooed his name on her freakin’ neck! True story, swear to God! Made me laugh my ass off—imagine that loser goin’, “Yeah, she’s mine!” Ha! What a tool. But it’s nuts, right? Findin’ one ain’t just “yo, gimme a girl.” Nah, it’s codes, weird apps, or sketchy dudes whisperin’ crap. Surprised me how high-tech it’s gotten—like, what, Tinder for hookers now?

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So, I’m walking down Via Garibaldi, right? The sun’s shining, birds are chirping, and I’m feeling good. But then I see this old lady struggling with her groceries. I rush over, thinking I’m a hero or something. Turns out, she just wanted to chat about her cat, Gino. I’m like, “Lady, I’m not a cat therapist!” But she’s got stories, man. Gino’s a legend in his own right.

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